King Of The Hill

[panzer34]

Being a former member of the Red cross it's my job to enforce the Geneva convention I inspect the hill and declare it a safe haven for myself and move the U.N in to enforce this

[JTS]

Anyone awake?

Sir Cliff threatens to sing at the local bingo hall

This causes untold chaos and panic among the local residents and mass hysteria forces the UN to act!

They evacuate  the hill (armed with industrial ear plugs) and go forth to mediate

Meanwhile I retake the hill aided by the Gods of Asgard and their drinking buddies from the great hall of Valhalla!

Thor will smash anyone with his mighty hammer who trys to take the hill and Loki will play tricks with their mind, Fernis the wolf will just swallow them whole.

The Valkyres have agreed to keep the hill tidy on the condition they are re armed with the latest dysons and that the pinnys don't clash with their metal breastplates

So with Odin sitting atop the hill with Huggin and Muggin and the frost giants patroling the perimeter I can safely say my hill!

[tiger205]

Glad to see those Valkyries are a clean & tidy bunch & that no fashion faux pas has been committed

[happytanker]

i think you ought to give fenris a bone for misspelling her name though or she may just be your downfall! 

[vonrundstedt]

After hearing about all your mythical creatures on the hill,Peter Jackson makes a visit and hire's all your monsters for his next Lord of the rings esc Epic. I boot you off the hill and take it for my self. Having just rekindled my interest in the vietnam war,I dig miles of under ground tunnels and bunkers and fill them Gi's like 'Animal Mother' and 'Cowboy' from full metal jacket. I all so lay punji stick traps, scorpian holes and napalm bombs connected by trip wires. On top of the hill, there are countless clay mores, fox holes and I also sit Ho Chi Minh himself  up there to keep watch. Any sign of trouble and he'll raise the alarm.IF you get through the clay mores and such, you'll have to fight it out in the tunnels with Animal Mother and his M60. The yanks found it hard going, how do you think you'll fair? Good luck.............My "Hamberger" Hill.

[JTS]

i think you ought to give fenris a bone for misspelling her name though or she may just be your downfall! 

yip my spelling is very poor to say the least, as for giving fenris a bone she (i thought he was the son of Loki?) is still chewing on balder's arm!

[wibblywobbly]

At the mere mention of Hamburgers I assault the hill and open a new branch of McDonalds, your entire army becomes obese and flatulent, making use of the tunnels impossible. I issue one last salvo of chicken nuggets with deli sauce and the hill is mine. No one can attack at night as our opening hours are 7am - 11pm.

[JTS]

The department of health close you down due to the disappearence of the local tramp community and the coarse sherry flavour of your big macs, (also "tiddles" collar appearing in a box of chicken mac nuggets didn't help).

You leave the hill looking for new franchises and a new wholesaler

The hill is mine and I set about renforcing it with fields of triffids and "mean green mothers from outer space" (pet shop of horrors) cause they're bad!

I fill the moat with blue box jelly fish and portugese man'o wars and as an aerial deterent I have borrowed "Ronnie Ray Gun's" Star wars  missle platform  which orbits the hill continually

My final deterent is a whole company of the legendery kamikaze highlanders (Monty Python) who ready to take on all comers!

My hill

[mikef350]

here is my first assualt on this pesky hill,as i am tired from reading the ten pages on peoples theories on how they would take the hill,i assemble the biggest army of squatters and while you are filling the the moat the squatters move up to the top of the hill.

the hill is now mine and lets see you try to get rid of the squatters

[[ICE]monkey]

i would wait untill it was sign on day , and all the squatters would be gone, then walk up and claim the hill , then leave it as i have to many tanks to finish /start in my workshop